The potty chair and the psychiatrist's couch

Short of having the throne with a sports, cars or BBQ theme, the dad's spin on potty training will have to wait 'til we're ready to "AIM AND FIRE!" For right now, it's about getting him to listen to what his body is saying.

With my oldest son, the advice was to "... just wait, don't rush it. He'll catch on when he's ready." Whatever. That advice had us in diapers forever. My toddler is able to tell me what he wants through gestures or nearly undecipherable words- clear signs he's ready to learn the wonders of indoor plumbing.

Follow my logic here. Your kid has known diapers since moments after birth. The longer he or she remains in diapers, the harder it will be to train them to use the toilet. The earlier you introduce the throne to him or her, the easier the transition should go.

Step 1, get out the chair and let the kid see it. Don't force anything, just let it be there as if it were any piece of furniture. Don't even call attention to it. Let the child discover it and when he does, say something like "that's for you when you're ready." It may be sitting out months before you're ready to take the next step, but the fewer things that are new and freaky to him, the better.

Step 2 in my process was to pull out the fun potty training videos. I highly recommend the potty training video "Bear in the Big Blue House." Anyway, my toddler watched that video over and over again - not because the subject matter was so riveting, but because it was new to him. Something must have stuck, because taking to the chair was fairly easy. After about 2 weeks of that video, we we're ready to take the next steps.

Step 3 is placing the reward. My toddler is a freak for fruit snacks so I bought a box and placed it in the bathroom in a highly visible but unreachable place. My friend says she used a jar of M&M's. Whatever trips your kid's trigger right?

Step 4 is taking notice of your child's natural rythm and tendencies. Does your kid need new diapers before or after eating, sleeping and waking? Those are good times to try the chair.

I began to notice his diapers were fairly dry in the morning comparatively and thought I'd set him up for success by placing him on the john when he potentially would go. Well, he didn't produce anything that first time, but I rewarded him with a fruit snack for trying. The next morning, he told me his word for fruit snack (sounds like bean - don't ask me why) and so I sat him on the chair again and viola! A few high fives all around and the all important fruit snack reward and I could see the light at the end of the diaper tunnel.

Potty training is a big deal. If done poorly, there's a real danger in emotionally scarring your child for life. If you don't want your child seeking psychiatric help well into his adulthood because of the potty training phase, appreciate the tiniest steps forward. Just sitting on the chair without producing anything is a monumental step forward. Heck, even having an accident is a sign your child is on his way to becoming potty trained.

One last thing, appreciate that your kid is in diapers, because soon as he's in big boy underpants, that little bladder has to go ALL the time.